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Valerie LeComte DO's avatar

This one is hard because people say in hindsight they wish you had said something. But I have said things to friends & it’s significantly impacted our friendships. When people are in denial about a partner they usually want to stay there & don’t want someone pointing out that their fairytale might not be so magical. And the majority of people prioritize romantic love over platonic love. I’ve learned to (mostly) keep my mouth shut unless asked.

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Patty Barrett's avatar

You're such a good friend and this is NOT an easy situation. I am just getting out of a 12-year (!!) situation with a Ben and I had 1-2 friends that showed similar concern and I essentially stopped talking to them because I didn't want them to "judge" me.

This year, when it finally ended, I realized what I had done and called my best friend to let her know that I had essentially been avoiding her and lying to her for years because I knew the truth and I didn't want to hear it.

I think the best thing you can do is be open and show loving concern, which is exactly what you did. I'm glad it has worked out for her in general, and for your friendship!

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