Happy Thanksgiving! We’re so grateful for you and this burgeoning community. This email’s got a lot of links and pictures, so click “View entire message” to read the whole thing.
As I (Aja) have gotten older, the excitement of receiving the perfect gift (while always delightful) has been overtaken by the excitement of giving the perfect gift. I’ll never forget the look on Sam’s face when he opened a bundle of T-shirts I’d gotten printed with his EP art — his first (but not last!!) artist “merch” — or my friend’s when I tracked down an unforgettable bottle of wine she’d had once and never been able to locate again.
To help you (and frankly, us) find those perfect gifts this year, we asked some of our favorite writers and Substackers what they’re looking forward to giving most.
Use this guide as inspiration or a catalog — whatever helps you arrive at the present you’ll be giddy watching your people unwrap. We can’t wait!
from :“I love, love, love, love, love shopping for and giving gifts!!!! It's one of my love languages for expressing myself and brings me so much joy. When I’m strapped for cash, I make collage cards with photos of the person and cut out shapes, something that shows I'm thinking of them.”
“I took up knitting during the pandemic so giving loved ones items hand-crafted by yours truly is so fucking fun partially because I am definitely bragging about my knitting prowess by giving them a knitted item lol. I made this hat for a friend in a gorgeous shade of inky blue and I'm nestling a little packet of weed gummies inside because this friend has been dealing with a lot of un-fun life stuff and has been curious about trying some anxiety-reduction gummies for a while now, but is hilariously too intimidated by weed shops to buy them for herself. Side note: weed shop (I am not a weed connoisseur can you tell?!) attendants are some of the friendliest, least-intimidating people I've ever encountered. I've tagged along to so many shops with a friend (who is a weed connoisseur) and they're all gems.”
“I'm really excited to give a celestial-inspired gift to my best friend of 30 years. She is one of my most spiritual friends and has taught me a lot about being in touch with my mind and body and tracking my emotions (and menstrual cycle) along with the ebbs and flows of the moon. While I was recently in Marfa, Texas, I bought her an original piece of art that charts every day of 2024 with a visual representation of what the moon looks like that day. It's a little bit practical and a lot magical.”
“I'm nestling a little packet of weed gummies inside because this friend has been dealing with a lot of un-fun life stuff.” - Sara Peterson
“One of my best life hacks is testing out potential tattoo concepts/placements with beautiful (and realistic) temporary tattoos. Get some for the person who’s considering a tattoo — along with a promise to go with them for the appointment.
After my friend Jocelyn mentioned she keeps restaurant matchboxes in a jar in her guest bathroom, I sent her some custom ones. This site has a great selection of unique designs (think chain restaurants and locations) if you don’t want to DIY.”
“Now that I have a handful of kids to spoil at the holidays (my toddler and my niece and nephew), the holiday shopping season is all about them. This year I jumped on the Black Friday sale at Loog Guitars and got this one for my son. It's a beautiful working miniature guitar that comes with teaching materials to start learning the basics, and my son was captivated with the one his cousin got at Christmas last year. Thanks to his obsession with music, we have previously introduced a mini drum set and a xylophone into the home, and I am eager to get him started on a less ear-splitting instrument. Three-year-olds are fickle, but I'm hopeful that he'll be excited when he unwraps it!”
“A few years ago, my family decided to stop giving Christmas gifts and instead have the gift be traveling to see each other — which cuts down on so much of the holiday stress. That being said, I'm planning on surprising my best friend with credits to a yoga studio we both love so we can go to more classes together. I'm all about gifts that emphasize experiences over items!”
“I’m excited to give my boyfriend the gift of a winter weekend getaway. We’ll pick some Pacific Northwest destination that we can reach by ferry (Vashon or Vancouver Island?). And you can bet that I’ll be checking the “amenities: indoor fireplace” box on my Airbnb search.”
“When Sam and I lived in Washington, DC, I bought him a year’s membership for the city’s Capital Bikeshare — something he frequently used for commuting, meeting up with friends, and just getting around town. I swear he told me, ‘This is the best gift you’ve ever given me!’ so I never forgot that one.”
“This hand-made set of instruments, which let you communicate via birdsong with Nightingales, Duck Mallards, Skylarks, Owls, Robin, and Mourning Doves, would be a lovely and super unique gift for a bird lover (of which I know surprisingly many!)”
Lilly Millman from
:“My husband (still getting used to saying that!) rarely buys clothes for himself, so since our first Christmas together, I've gotten him a new sweater. Every year around mid- to late-November, J. Crew has an incredible men's sweater sale where pieces can go for up to 50% off, so that's where I always start my search. I always get him a sweater that's 100% wool, in a loud color or pattern because he likes to have fun with what he wears. Don't tell him, but this year I'm eyeing something like the Lambswool Fair Isle sweater.
In my opinion, the perfect gift is an elevated version of a necessity — something the receiver probably wouldn't splurge on themselves, but would use constantly. Last year, I got my sister and her partner a set of flannel sheets from Brooklinen, mostly because I was so obsessed with my own. Flannel sheets really are the way to go in the winter because they're warm instantly unlike cotton sheets. They loved them and used them all season long!”
“I’ve given (and received) several blankets in recent years that feel so luxurious I’m willing to fight over them when cuddling up on the couch. All-time favorites (machine washable and worth the $100+ price point!) include ChappyWrap, Sunday Citizen, and Turkish T.”
“In my opinion, the perfect gift is an elevated version of a necessity — something the receiver probably wouldn't splurge on themselves, but would use constantly.” - Lilly Millman
“For anyone snowed in sans fireplace, L.L. Bean’s Wicked Good slippers and Bombas’ Gripper Slipper sherpa-lined booties are classics for a reason — and the next best thing after a winter getaway.”
Melinda Fakuade from
:“My mom is really bad about wrapping her hair at night — she usually falls asleep before she remembers to do it. I’m thinking about getting her a silk pillowcase! Personally, my boyfriend and I are never going back to regular old pillowcases; silk pillowcases feel so good on the skin, and for those who are temperature sensitive as I am when I sleep, I find they are rarely too hot or too cold.
You also can’t go wrong with Eberjey pajamas — I have two sets and they’re so cute, and the Tencel material is so breathable if you don’t want to go for cotton or silk.
My 18 year old sister is really into Tom Ford’s Tobacco Vanille perfume, but has always used dupes from different Etsy sellers because it’s a million dollars. Here is a perfume hack: somewhere in your city, there are some MENA-owned health and beauty supply shops. They typically sell over a hundred different perfume oils, many of which are dupes for popular scents. My local shop had a leathery vanilla scent that was a clear dupe, so I am planning to get her a jumbo rollerball of that. I bought myself a vanilla musk scented one that I layer as a base for many of my perfumes, and it’s been a game changer.”
“Giving my mom this Eucalyptus neck pillow, which you can heat up in the microwave during the chillier months or chill in the freezer when it’s warm out. She’ll also be getting a eucalyptus subscription to really round this gift out.
I love the smell of incense but am not as enthusiastic about the college dorm room vibes the sticks can give off… however, this beautiful leaf-shaped incense kit wouldn’t look out of place in an Architectural Digest photo shoot.”
“I'm obsessed with this brand’s offbeat, vintage-inspired designs. My sister-in-law eats a sweet potato a day (it's a whole thing) and I feel like this gift will make her giggle — but it's still so fun and cute. And there's truly an At the Moment shirt for everyone on your list; if not sweet potatoes, there are shirts featuring pancakes, avocados, furniture, corgis… the list goes on and on.”
“I'm most excited to get my 12-year-old niece this Mini East West Prism necklace from Asha Patel Designs. The minimalist design is perfect for an active lifestyle, as is the variety of gemstones to choose from for whatever challenge you're facing.”
Note: this necklace is now sold out, but the brand has several other designs.
“I'm pumped to give my mom a pair of Raesyn walking shoes. We're both addicted to walking — at least four miles a day — and Raesyn are the best walking shoes I've ever owned. It's a female-owned company and their slogan is "for those who walk to sweat" which I just love. We can't all be runners, but I still consider my daily walks to be very athletic! My mom has been coveting a pair for months so I know she's going to be thrilled. (Use code CAROC for 10% off.)”
“I'm most excited to gift this incredible hat to my friend Katie, who is a diehard Celine Dion fan, and who I am certain is going to lose her goddamn mind when I give it to her. Fun fact: I literally chased down a woman wearing this hat in a store in my hometown in September. I was all OH MY GOD I NEED THAT WHERE IS IT FROM and she was all, Chill, girl, you can get it on Etsy. And get it on Etsy I did! (I actually ordered mine from THIS seller — but it looks like that specific hat is currently sold out. if you want my exact one, keep your eyes peeled! Or buy the "these gays, they're trying to murder me" hat instead.)”
Melinda Fakuade from
:“My twin sister has been trying to buy clothes that are made of better materials, so I’ll likely hunt for some nice sweaters for her, perhaps from Source Unknown or Reformation.”
“I’ve always wondered who dropped more than $200 on a single gift (even for your partner, this sounds like a lot), but I can’t help myself: I have to include these monogrammed Mansur Gavriel ballerina flats that are a startling $485 because they are SO cute and would be SO fun to give.”
“I literally chased down a woman wearing this hat in a store in my hometown in September. I was all OH MY GOD I NEED THAT WHERE IS IT FROM.” - Sarah Jacobson
“My sister and I live in different cities, but I still love buying matching clothes so we can channel our inner MK&A — pajamas, t-shirts, sweatshirts, etc. This year, I’m excited to give her this perfect green beanie from Imogene & Willie, a Nashville-based small business known for their denim. We both live in snowy cities (me in Boston, her in Minneapolis) so beanies are a must-have this time of year. I got yellow!”
“I am a notoriously last-minute gift purchaser, so I admit I don’t know who will be getting these yet, but I am very excited to gift someone the Noor Earmuffs from Hill House — they’re 30% off and I am a huge fan of a practical yet aesthetically pleasing gift.
Also have to give a shout out to some very cute merch that we happened to design for our podcast, Love To See It! I live in my Bachelor Studies crewneck, and I gifted my boyfriend a Premium Crest Crewneck to match me. And it’s all 10% off right now with code LTSI10. 💕”
Lilly Millman from
:“For the ‘person who has it all’ and is notoriously hard to shop for, I usually go for some sort of monthly subscription service. [My best friend and co-author] Melinda and her partner Paul once gifted me a few months’ subscription to the Eater Wine Club, and I loved it so much that I've given the 3-month plan to two or three people since. One Christmas, I also got my husband a Gourmet Cheese of the Month Club for a few months, and he still talks about it to this day.”
“For TV lovers, a cute mug with their favorite TV show characters can never go wrong. It’s a simple but useful gift to be filled with hot chocolate, eggnog, or if you are in northern Europe as I am, Glühwein. If you are in the southern hemisphere, the mug can also be useful to drink caipirinhas or mojitos.”
“Giving a What to Cook subscription to the people in my life who want to cook more but don’t have a ton of time or energy — as recommended by one of my other mom friends! Caroline’s weekly recipes are always straightforward, ready in less than an hour, and delicious (best of all, you never have to hit multiple stores to buy the ingredients.)”
“For the person who called our gift request hotline, saying they need a present for their mom — who only wants a ‘homemade card’ and doesn’t drink alcohol or, coffee, wear jewelry, or like candles/scents but does like ice cream — Herrell’s Hot Fudge Trio is perfect for an ice cream lover, complementing something she likely already has in her fridge. (And if you know her supply’s running low, pair it with a five pints of Jeni’s best-selling ice cream, which delivers nation-wide!)
Making sushi at home is one of those activities that sounds really fun until you look at everything you need to buy. That’s why this Sushi Making Kit is such a great gift — all the fun, none of the friction.
One of my go-to gift ideas is packaging food with its accessory. Think: a really special flour with a pastry blender; a Cheese Vault (with some nice cheeses from your local cheesemonger, Whole Foods, or heck! grocery store); the best salt with a salt container…
This one’s niche, but I’m SO excited to give this giant White-Rabbit-shaped container of White Rabbit candies to someone I had a conversation with about them back a few months ago.”
“I’m most excited to give a copy of The Last Love Note, a novel by Australian author Emma Grey that we’re publishing at Zibby Books. I just know that anyone who reads will fall in love with the characters, laugh and cry, and leave feeling more connected to love itself. It’s a gift in and of itself! I’ll be giving this to all my girlfriends!”
“The ceramic fruit from IOTA Edit by artist Paul Molloy is my favorite gift to give at the moment. I just bought one of my best friends a set after she found my car (a long story) and I’m considering a set of brown pears for my mum! (I myself have the gold topped garlic. I keep it on the fruit bowl with the ‘genuine’ fruit, alongside a terracotta pomegranate, to really outfox my husband.)”
“My brother is a huge rap fan, and we're from Atlanta, so I'm legally obligated to get him Rap Capital: An Atlanta Story by New York Times reporter Joe Coscarelli. It tells the story — or, well, many stories — of how Atlanta became the nucleus for all things hip-hop culture, and how that's affected the city and vice versa. I hope he reads it quickly because I want to borrow it.”
“For GIFT gifts, I follow a few accounts and newsletters that provide year-round inspiration, like Little King, The ARK Elements, and Vivi et Margot. The last two are definitely aspirational — they're full of gorgeous house decor and kitchenware I wish I could afford — but you can still find items at every price range. Little King, on the other hand, is kooky and design-y and exciting and more affordable. This year for my best friend in L.A., I bought this cocktail shrimp ornament, some neon candles for dinner parties, and this ‘flower frog,’ a Japanese tool for flower arranging that takes the place of toxic floral foam. The whole order, plus shipping, came out to just under $50. Last year I bought her a birthday present (this vibe-y puzzle) from the same shop.”
“I have a lot of dear bookworms in my life, and a lot of folks who wish they had more time to read but are really busy with work/life/the general anxiety of being a person alive on earth at this moment in time. I promise they are not sponsoring me, but I'm looking forward to gifting a friend a Book of the Month subscription — I've had one for a few years now and have found it such an easy way to introduce myself to new authors and genres that I wouldn't normally pick at the bookstore. (Also! Related to the written word — I love snail mail and I am embarking upon a postcard campaign this holiday season, which I am very excited about. I'm looking forward to sending them over the next five weeks to my family, friends, and newsletter readers.)”
Melinda Fakuade from
:“Whenever I don’t know what to get assorted girlies in my life, I just think of the beauty stuff that has made my life better over the years or in recent memory and go from there. Off the top of my head, some great candidates are Clinique Almost Lipstick in Black Honey, fancy hand soaps and hand creams, the Clarins depuffing mask, the Dieux Instant Angel moisturizer, and a Kiss Falscara DIY extension kit.”
“Technically I’ve already given Sam this Kindle Remote — I bought one for us each after the nights got cold enough we didn’t want to stick our hands out of the covers to hold our Kindles up. This remote is so extra in the best way possible. It’s very fun to flip virtual pages while barely moving.
I looked at roughly 30 lighters before deciding on this one; I really wanted something fun yet affordable (surprisingly rare.) Give it to the person in your life with a great candle collection…
Or the weed connoisseur, in which case you should pair it with this beautiful three-piece smoking set (tray, pipe, one-hitter).
My friend Mike’s culinary calling card is pasta (his bolognese beats every restaurant version I’ve tried); I can’t wait to see his face when he unwraps these mega-sized pasta candles.”
But wait, there’s more…
The most popular link from Monday’s newsletter was this Instagram account reimagining what Taylor Swift would wear if she was stylish. If you can’t get enough gift ideas, we also featured more than a dozen recommendations from Mmoody Kids founder Justine Bronaugh.
Now it’s your turn — tell us what you’re most excited to give this year to the people you love in the comments.
Platonic Love is an entirely reader-supported and affiliate-free publication. Thank you so much for supporting us and helping keep this newsletter running. We’re spending the day with family, feeling grateful. We’ll see you on Monday for the links we’ve been sending our friends! xx A+A
Everything about this gift guide is delightful. Homemade collage cards! Bird-call instruments! PASTA CANDLES!
Some years, holiday shopping feels like a chore, but I'm newly inspired about the undertaking. 🤗
Thanks for including our picks! This gift guide has so many gems -- I'm particularly eyeing the leaf shaped incense and the Jeni's pack! - MF