Issue: #63: It's been awhile since our last catch up.
Aliza (finally) started therapy, Aja cancelled a dress appointment, and a few other updates.
If you enjoy reading Platonic Love each week, there are a few ways to let us know and show your support: “like” this post, leave us a comment, upgrade to a Paid subscription, or share Platonic Love with your friends. Thanks for your support!
Before we dive in: Monday’s guest, , published an essay this week on the cost of friendship — something we’ve spent a lot of time talking about over the past several months. It’s worth the read!
Aja’s Updates:
📱My screen time has been… not good for a while.
But I’ve always figured that as long as being on my phone didn’t interfere with life, it was fine. Then Sam asked if we could spend one hour a night watching The Wire sans phones. The last few shows we’d watched together, I’d barely followed the plot — too busy scrolling — and he thought it’d be more enjoyable if we were both, you know, actually watching it.
The suggestion legitimately panicked me. I said yes (but only after asking, “Is this important to you?”...!), and kept my phone in my lap for the entire episode. I had to keep fighting the urge to pick it up. When the show ended, I felt a surge of relief.
But the relief didn’t last long, because this experience revealed what I’d been in denial about: I was addicted to my phone.
And, like most dependencies and addictions, my phone always brought short-term pleasure without long-term fulfillment. I often reached the end of a two-plus-hour scrolling session feeling empty, a little sick — like I’d kept running and running to find something but never gotten there. Maybe the next listicle, the next Reddit post, the next TikTok video, would make me feel satisfied — but of course, it never did.
So I cut back: way, way back. And probably unsurprisingly, although it’s been hard (and I certainly have days where I spend a lot more time on my phone than I like), since reducing my screen-time I feel more present, my days feel longer and fuller, and my life feels more satisfying.